for all my fans who thought i was done . . .

please note that i'm just working like my life depends on it nowadays.

since starting my new job in January, my life and hours have taken a similar tone to the days of Hell a.k.a. WRG. i'm lucky to leave the office before 7 PM and i haven't seen a happy hour that wasn't work related in months. but all of this is not a complaint, aside from the 10 lbs i've put on with my regan building food court visits and late night dinners, rather a justification for the responsibilities and money i now have.

so in the coming days i'm going car shopping - a major fear of car ownership has to be tackled - and i'm looking for a condo!

DC is a fabulous city, so i have to buy my little piece of it, all 200K of it, sooner or later.

the army ten miler training began today - 11 weeks of training and hopefully 7-10 lbs lost. fingers crossed and positive thoughts in the air . . . oh and a 10 mile race completed, too.

best birthday EVER!

wanna party, wanna dance, wanna be myself tonight . . .

due to the negative events of the past few months, i was hell-bent on having an amazing birthday celebration. a full blown, week-long extravaganza to ring in my new year. my own world tour. non-stop partying. it would be a birthday to remember!

seeing that beyonce re-released her b'day album on my b'day, the bar was pretty high on how out of control my celebrating would be. thanks to a set of deliberate missions of my self-proclaimed theme song, i got more than what i expected. much more.

WEEK OF EVENTS

friday - fellow aries b'day party

saturday - b'day buddy house party

sunday - dinner with the fam

monday - musiq concert at LOVE

tueday - b'day happy hour

wednesday & thursday - rest

friday - sushi with my mississppi folks

saturday - the official party

sunday - dinner with the fam and friends to recoup

before my "tour" was established, i found a pair of amazing red pumps in late feb or early march. the ultimate birthday shoe. no dress in sight or mind, but the shoe was a keeper even if i was forced to wear a pair of spanks and a bra.

mission one - i'mma put this on/when he see me

in this dress/i'mma get me some

late march, while lolly gagging during my lunch break, i wondered into banana republic and stumbled upon the cutest silk, black and white polka-dot wrap dress. a perfect match for the F-ME pumps.

mission two - gotta make that call/tell' em get the bottles poppin'

when they play my song

after many days of deliberating, i settled on a chic location in a nice part of town. my boy JB has a hookup, so it was pretty much a done deal to get a table, a couple of bottles in a spot with a nice DJ to ensure a night of fun.

mission three - got my three best friends/like we do it all

the time/we gon' do it again

one of my best friends from college, LL, decided that this would be a perfect weekend to finally come visit. BFF #1. my girl from NJ was coming home for easter weekend. BFF #2 and all of my other girls: E, CJ, Banke, A, etc. count as the third, since KD couldn't make it.

i ain't worried doing me tonight

a little sweat ain't never hurt nobody

while ya'll standin' on the wall

i'm the one tonight

getting bodied . . .

all i'm with tonight is gettin bodied

ain't no shame cuz I gotta get mine

swing my hair and kick off my shoes

come here boy, let me work on you

overall the night was filled with drinks, table dancing and endless memorable moments. the only way to top this year is to do absolutely nothing next year.

only the photos and hilarious anecdotes have allowed me to piece together the events of my glamorous event. i was so gone that i accused one my girls of being a no-show, until i saw a picture to prove her attendance. now that's a party. of course i can't show all of my pics, but here are a couple . . .

for shits and giggles, here's a head to head comparison of last year to this year . . .


last year: on the night of one of the worst storms of the spring, one of clients was stuck in the airport, in danger of missing a $20K speaking engagement, peppering my night with anxious moments and ridiculous phone calls the night of my party and actual b'day. STRESS!


this year: on the day of my actual b'day i was tasked with gathering 10 people, which grew to at least 20 at a restaurant, an amazing night to celebrate little ole' me, not to mention a nice tip for our waiter, who remembers me to this day. NO STRESS!


last year: crying at the end of the night because some simple little boy told me he would never love me. who the hell says that to someone on their b'day?


this year: crying at the end of the night because i was toasted and beyond happy with the number of people who came out to help me celebrate (and get me toasted). who the hell wouldn't cry when they are surrounded by friends and colleagues who are showing nothing but love?

at the end of the day, who gives two damns about last year . . . this year was amazing!

one year later . . .

so to make a long story short, mr. man and i had a lovely thang going on - spent an amazing new year's eve together, went to the inaugural ball together - just an amazing time and the complete opposite of the mess of a whatever it was with the boy.

fast forward to a random evening and the boy text messaged me trying to push back up on me and i flat out, without a second thought turned him down. i found the strength to do that because of how mr. man made me feel.

of course four days later i find out mr. man is boy 2.0 - a liar, selfish, the list goes on and on . . .

so on valentine's day, exactly one year from the day that i sat across from the boy, i realize that the boy and mr. man taught me a lot and i thank them both for that. the grass is always greener, but i'm cool sittin here on the fence until mr. i appreciate you for who you are and want to make you happy comes along.

update: nov 06 - jan 07

okay, so its been a while . . . sorry for the delay, but i've been making some adjustments and upgrading my life.

new job - check
new long hours to justify the new salary - check
new man - had one and he was a new and improved version of the old, so i let him go

so more on the new man that i had and let go, cause the whole situation was soo blog-alicious . . .

so a few weeks after boy and i went our separate ways, or i showed my not so mature side for the last time, my girl e told me to check out a personality test on one of these not so well know dating web sites. i obliged in an effort to learn a little more about myself and signed up for a temporary (free) profile. within a few days the winks and such trickled in and i was electronically introduced to a very nice young man who spent 6-7 weeks courting me.

details of liar 2.0 - 31, scorpio, 6'3", graduate of the same high school i attended, chocolate and politically aware, which was sooo necessary with the changes i have going on in my life, all and all he was a gentleman til the very end and i appreciated every moment prior to the downfall of the fairytale.

first date: movie and light fare. he was a little uptight, but not at all like the last first date i'd had with seeing that he didn't try to slob me down in the restaurant or invite himself up to my place. we sat in his car for 3 hours (i walked in my apartment at 3:15 AM) talking and swapping dating war stories. nice.

to be continued . . . and it well worth the wait

cashed in my v card

today after work i lost my virginity. hair virginity that is. for the past year i've been growing my hair sans the chemical process that many of my friends have forsaken for one reason or another. if i'd realized how difficult it is to maintain natural hair when its as "strong" as mine, i would have reconsidered a LONG time ago.

seeing that my mother has had her hair locked for nearly 7 years and i'd cut my hair off before, i didn't think the going natural thing would be that difficult. yeah right.

when i wanted the bouncy, oprah look i'd get my hair pressed, yes old fashioned pressing comb and everything, but at $60 a pop every other week and the burned hair smell that i couldn't wash out was just too much. not to mention the fact that my hair, or lambs wool as it had affectionately been renamed, was too much for me to handle. my press wouldn't last more than 5 days, tops and walking around on the off weeks with a headwrap or looking like combs didn't like me was not gonna work anymore.

being kinly/curly or for the sake of being real, nappy, was cool, it was like being a virgin all over again. to see the amazement in the eyes of non-natural sisters was similar to the awe that i saw in others faces when my "untouched" friends in college would announce there sexual purity. up until today i had virgin hair and i was proud of it. i guess the means that i can't buy that "curly" tee shirt from miss jessies.

the internal struggle that many of my sisters and i face when it comes to hair are not clearly understood by our white counterparts - to relax or not to relax is a serious question. even my fairer-skinned less-kinky haired sisters can't fully comprehend the idea of a hot comb not being enough to tame the tangles and kinks for a long period of time. what they fail to realize is managing hair should not be this diffucult or expensive.

god made relaxers just for me and at this point in my life i am not going to fight the demons or feel less black because being natural is the new fad. i've embraced my native roots (for a whole 12 months) and my hair is healthier for it, but at this point i was sacrificing my health and exercise because of my hair issues and that ain't gonna work.

so thanks to my fabulous stylist, fela and his friend, for hooking me up. super bone straight hair is the groove again in my book. one day my mother and i won't look so mix matched ;)

artist portrayal of NT and her momma - locks and perm - okay not really cause i'm not 14!

moving right along . . .

so the chapter has finally closed on me and the boy. yes, this is long overdue, but hey, everything happens in due time. unfortunately, i was unable to walk away from the situation with an ounce of dignity, but whatever, the humiliation of the final moments will keep me from going back for more embarrassment.

in the end, i have no regrets. enough lies were told, too much resentment built up, overall, despite the love we shared, there was no true respect. i screamed and cursed him, he lied and cheated on me - fucked with my karma. in every moment there is a lesson and i have learned more about me, my limits and my strengths and weaknesses.

i harbor no ill will towards the boy. our judgement was impaired, the foundation was never solid and we never had a chance. but i love him still and i miss him for what he was to me and the friend that i thought he always would be.

thanks for the memories . . .

SHUT THE F*UCK UP ROSIE!!! DAYUM!!!

so yesterday i stumbled upon the news that kelly ripa was none to happy with her guest co-host clay aiken. while on the show he was a rude and obnoxious smart ass, which made it hard for kelly to be her usual "i'm so happy to host this show" self.

while they were interviewing Emmit Smith, clay decided that he would cover kelly's mouth with his hand so he could ask a question. here's where the drama begins . . . kelly called him out on it and said what any NORMAL person would say "i don't know where your hands have been". living in a major city and knowing full well that some people are not as big on hygiene as others, i understand kelly's issue with that. gay or not, if you shake hands with a room full of people, people who may have changed a diaper and not washed their hands or wiped their own dirty bottom and skipped the sink, and think its appropriate to cover someone elses mouth with your now ecoli ridden hands you've got some serious issues and should be bitch slapped. but did kelly do that - nope, she simply called him out on it.

donald trump doesn't shake hands, does that make him a people-phobe or racist? no, he simply doesn't like germs!!!

when my girl e is kissed on the hand by the random homeless man and immediately walks away scrubbing her hand with antibacterial wipes does that make her anti-homeless, nope, she just doesn't like other people's germs on her body.

so to say that kelly's statement was homophobic is ridiculous! what dumbass would think that she was referring to his sexual orientation? the same dumbass that wants to put everybody else's business out there - star had a gastic bypass, o and gayle are gay, blah, blah, blah . . . bitch mind your business and worry about your own. now when kelly is off the show for a week cause she got the flu, don't say a damn thing, just know that she got it from dirty handed clay touching her all in the mouth. rude ass!