degrees of separation
i'm constantly reminded of how small the world actually is nowadays. in random DC conversations its easy to hear the name of someone you know by way of someone else. during a encounter with fellow HBCU alums, its easy to find a greek connection, hometown connection or just weird i know him/her from a party connection.
recently these random connections have come to a head for me. one of my girls is actually dating a guy she went to college with and he just so happens to be from the city where i went to college and my best friend from college used to babysit for his family. the most recent connection has been between a guy i've known for years, i'll call him HU Man, but never dated and a guy i was seeing. i innocently let my beau at the time use my computer to do whatever and in glancing at my im friend list he noticed a name familiar to him from his college days.
beau: you know HU Man
NT: yeah . . . (as i made the college connection and realized that this could potentially be a problem seeing that i was trying to hook up a hookup session with HU Man)
beau: really? how well do you know him? how do you know him?
NT: we met a few years ago at a club in VA and we've stayed in touch
beau: oh, in the club, so i know AB got some, he is an [undisclosed Greek organization], you know how those dudes can be, i know he got that, or at least tried. .
NT: umm, no (an honest answer, seeing that he had tried, but i remained fully aware of the tinge of jealousy in beau's questions and statements)
beau: you know if you and [undisclosed Greek organization] boy talked or whatever, we would have to stop talking
NT: well, then we're fine, he and i never messed with each other and i don't foresee it happening beau: ever?
NT: ever
beau and i have had situations where HU Man has come up, and it was always reinforced that if he and i talked there would a problem. i'm not one to gamble with the connection thing, seeing that it bit me in the ass a few years ago.
fast forward a few months . . . here's a conversation between me and HU man
HU Man: sooooooo, when can I SEE U?!?!
NT: ummmm, that may be a problem
HU Man: nevermind
HU Man: no need to elaborate on THAT one.
NT: i used all my vacation on hawaii
HU Man: uh huh
NT: what?
HU Man: I thought you were gonna say something else, like you had a boyfriend or something
NT: well . . .
NT: that's not exactly far from the truth either
HU Man: noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
NT: i guess you didn't get what i was saying on that email last week
HU Man: what did I miss?!?!
NT: the email where i said i could never talk to/date/mess with you because of a school connection
HU Man: who cares about the HU connection
NT: he cares
HU Man: me and my classmates aren't attached at the hip
HU Man: He KNOWS me?!?!
NT: yeah
NT: i told you that in the email
HU Man: WHO IS HE?
NT: i'm not telling you
HU Man: tell me
HU Man: how you gonna DISCUSS ME with him, but not tell me WHO HE IS?!?
HU Man: HUH?!?!
NT: i don't discuss you with him
HU Man: but he KNOWS that you KNOW ME.
HU Man: WTF?!!?
NT: yeah
NT: that thru me for a loop, too
NT: he saw your name on my im list
HU Man: you're killin me dude
NT: its [beau]
HU Man: WTF?!!?
NT: he's not my boyfriend though
NT: just to clarify . . .
after several moments of silence . . .
NT: are you not speaking to me now?
NT: alrighty
NT: well . . . have a great night
well, apparently HU Man was taken for a loop by the reveal and a 5 year friendship is now obsolete because i dated someone who flat out told me "you know if you and HU Man ever messed with each other we would have to stop talking". Seeing that HU Man seemed to only want my panties and we've never seen each other since meeting in the club YEARS ago, there is no reason to put something tangible on the line for a possible and never-tested jumpoff.
but, being the second guesser that i am, i keep wondering if i should have said anything at all . . . i guess i'll never know.
recently these random connections have come to a head for me. one of my girls is actually dating a guy she went to college with and he just so happens to be from the city where i went to college and my best friend from college used to babysit for his family. the most recent connection has been between a guy i've known for years, i'll call him HU Man, but never dated and a guy i was seeing. i innocently let my beau at the time use my computer to do whatever and in glancing at my im friend list he noticed a name familiar to him from his college days.
beau: you know HU Man
NT: yeah . . . (as i made the college connection and realized that this could potentially be a problem seeing that i was trying to hook up a hookup session with HU Man)
beau: really? how well do you know him? how do you know him?
NT: we met a few years ago at a club in VA and we've stayed in touch
beau: oh, in the club, so i know AB got some, he is an [undisclosed Greek organization], you know how those dudes can be, i know he got that, or at least tried. .
NT: umm, no (an honest answer, seeing that he had tried, but i remained fully aware of the tinge of jealousy in beau's questions and statements)
beau: you know if you and [undisclosed Greek organization] boy talked or whatever, we would have to stop talking
NT: well, then we're fine, he and i never messed with each other and i don't foresee it happening beau: ever?
NT: ever
beau and i have had situations where HU Man has come up, and it was always reinforced that if he and i talked there would a problem. i'm not one to gamble with the connection thing, seeing that it bit me in the ass a few years ago.
fast forward a few months . . . here's a conversation between me and HU man
HU Man: sooooooo, when can I SEE U?!?!
NT: ummmm, that may be a problem
HU Man: nevermind
HU Man: no need to elaborate on THAT one.
NT: i used all my vacation on hawaii
HU Man: uh huh
NT: what?
HU Man: I thought you were gonna say something else, like you had a boyfriend or something
NT: well . . .
NT: that's not exactly far from the truth either
HU Man: noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
NT: i guess you didn't get what i was saying on that email last week
HU Man: what did I miss?!?!
NT: the email where i said i could never talk to/date/mess with you because of a school connection
HU Man: who cares about the HU connection
NT: he cares
HU Man: me and my classmates aren't attached at the hip
HU Man: He KNOWS me?!?!
NT: yeah
NT: i told you that in the email
HU Man: WHO IS HE?
NT: i'm not telling you
HU Man: tell me
HU Man: how you gonna DISCUSS ME with him, but not tell me WHO HE IS?!?
HU Man: HUH?!?!
NT: i don't discuss you with him
HU Man: but he KNOWS that you KNOW ME.
HU Man: WTF?!!?
NT: yeah
NT: that thru me for a loop, too
NT: he saw your name on my im list
HU Man: you're killin me dude
NT: its [beau]
HU Man: WTF?!!?
NT: he's not my boyfriend though
NT: just to clarify . . .
after several moments of silence . . .
NT: are you not speaking to me now?
NT: alrighty
NT: well . . . have a great night
well, apparently HU Man was taken for a loop by the reveal and a 5 year friendship is now obsolete because i dated someone who flat out told me "you know if you and HU Man ever messed with each other we would have to stop talking". Seeing that HU Man seemed to only want my panties and we've never seen each other since meeting in the club YEARS ago, there is no reason to put something tangible on the line for a possible and never-tested jumpoff.
but, being the second guesser that i am, i keep wondering if i should have said anything at all . . . i guess i'll never know.